Monkey Whizz Review: Will It Pass A Drug Test?
In this Monkey Whizz review, you going to learn everything you need to know to pass a drug test using this popular brand of fake urine.
But more than that, we’re going to talk honestly about how likely you are to pass a drug test using Monkey Whizz. We will talk about its complexity, instructions, and whether Monkey Whizz really works for drug tests.
Plus, I’ll clear up some confusion around Monkey Whizz. Monkey Whizz is actually not the name of the fake urine at all, and I’ll explain why in this review. I’ll also finish by comparing Monkey Whizz to other popular brands of urine so you can make a good buying decision.
Let’s Explain What Monkey Whizz Actually Is
Monkey Whizz is not the name of the urine. That’s a common misconception.
The company who makes it, Serious Monkey Bizness, actually have four products in their range:
- Monkey urine
- Monkey Flask
- Monkey Whizz
- Monkey dong
Monkey urine is just a vial of powdered urine. You don’t get a heatpad with it, and it’s useless for passing drug tests.
Monkey Dong is a very expensive prosthetic penis that holds fake urine so that you can pass a supervised drug test. Personally, I think you would be nuts to attempt that.
The actual Monkey Whizz product is an incognito belt. The urine is spread out around the belt you put on so that as a man you can stand and dispense the urine through a tap in a natural position. Again, it’s sort of designed for supervised tests, but it’s not as obvious as a prosthetic penis. Or it can be used for an unsupervised test, where it could have the benefit of keeping the urine closer to body temperature.
So what we’re actually talking about in this review is Monkey Flask. You get premixed urine and a heatpad. That makes it comparable to the other popular brands of fake urine out there.
The key takeaway from what I’ve just said here is that Monkey Whizz is a product, not urine. Also, you get the same urine in all four products, even the powdered urine is exactly the same in composition, there is no trading up on quality.
How To Use Monkey Whizz
Instructions for using Monkey Whizz are straightforward, the same as any other premixed synthetic urine that uses a heatpad:
- My top tip at the start of these instructions is to always make sure you activate the heatpad before you heat the fake urine sample up. That means it will be emitting a steady heat for several minutes before you strap the sample to it, which means the sample won’t have time to cool at all.
- Put the flask of Monkey Whizz into the microwave heat it for about 10 seconds. Shake it gently and look at the temperature strip. If it’s not reading, heat it again for a few seconds. You want to get a reading on the temperature strip that is as close to 100°F as possible, but you don’t want to go over that. Any reading between 90°F and 100°F is legally acceptable, but if you get it close 100°F it gives you a larger margin for error.
- Wear two pairs of underpants. Tape the Monkey Whizz Flask to the heatpad and tuck it between the two pairs of underpants. Then put on baggy jogging bottoms. You won’t be searched as this is an unsupervised drug test, but you don’t want to draw unwanted attention to yourself.
- Just before you go in to submit your sample, the key part to making sure Monkey Whizz works for you is to influence the bit you can: the temperature. Check it still above 90°F, and if it’s not you’ll need to warm the sample up somehow, I’d recommend hot water.
Does Monkey Whizz Work?
Whichever type of fake urine you buy, you’ll want to know if it’s going to pass a drug test for you.
Does Monkey Whizz work? Well, that depends on the type of drug test.
If it’s a basic drug test, a simple, cheap, five-panel drug test for something like pre-employment purposes, then yes, the formula Monkey Whizz will probably be good enough. Does Monkey Whizz contain creatine? Yes it does, and its structure is as follows:
- Monkey Whizz contains creatinine (a waste product of creatine)
- Monkey Whizz also contains urea and uric acid
- Monkey Whizz looks like human urine
- Monkey Whizz is also balanced for pH and specific gravity
But that’s all it’s got. It doesn’t froth like urine does when you watch it hit the toilet bowl, and it doesn’t really smell like it either. But for a cheap drug test, it’s unlikely to face that much of close physical scrutiny anyway.
If you used Monkey Whizz for a more advanced drug test, then it’s basic formula would probably get found out. As I’ve said, for basic pre-employment drug tests, and as long as you make sure it’s within that magical 10° temperature range, then it should be fine.
What’s Better Than Monkey Flask?
If you’re convinced that you want to use Monkey Whizz, then you can buy it by clicking here. It’s the authorized reseller and you’ll get all the Monkey Whizz products at the best price, with the monkey Flask costing just $40.
Don’t make the Monkey Whizz Amazon mistake. Don’t buy it from Amazon, eBay, or any general marketplace. It could be out of date, already warmed up, or even fake.
The conclusion of my Monkey Whizz review is that it’s definitely good enough to pass a basic drug test. If it’s just pre-employment for a basic position, you don’t have much money, or you just don’t care, then Monkey Flask will be plenty good enough.
But if you’re facing a potentially more advanced drug test and deeper scrutiny, then I would recommend Sub Solution or Quick Luck.
Both of these are made by Clear Choice, and the only real difference is that Quick Luck is premixed and slightly more advanced in the formula.
However, both contain at least 14 chemicals found in urine, are perfectly balanced, and mimic the physicality of human urine closely as well in all ways. More than that, you don’t rely on a heatpad using Quick Luck or Sub Solution, which takes away the main reason why people fail to use fake urine samples.
Sub Solution and Quick Luck both use heat activator powder. So you don’t even need to heat the sample up with a microwave in advance.
Just before you go into the building, tap in some of the heat activator powder and agitate the liquid to walk up. Tap some in bit by bit until it reads on the temperature strip, and you’ve then got about 20 minutes to submit your sample. For an in-depth synthetic urine, review check out this article.